I'm Tired

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28 NIV

I'm tired. Aren't you tired? I'm tired. My spirit is tired. I have physical energy for days but my heart is burdened. I try not to let it interfere with my obligations but it's hard. It takes every ounce of my being to keep running. Yeah, I'm tired.

And no, a quick prayer will not magically lift my weary soul. It's not a mythical potion like coffee. It's a process. It's letting God know, hey, today I'm tired. Give me strength to make it through my work. Hey God, I'm still tired. Give me strength to do this one thing. It's telling him how you feel. God's not afraid to hear it. In fact, he already knows and wants you to admit it. Then the healing process can begin.

So yes, God can restore a weary heart. And he will. Give it time. God will be there for as long as it takes.

Truly Free

Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. 2 Corinthians 3:17 NIV

My mother passed away this week after a battle with dementia. Such a cruel war raged on a brilliant mind. Ever since my dad died she had talked about wanting to join him. Her faith in her Lord and her certainty about her eternal future overrode any fears she had about death. She knew there was freedom to be gained in the spirit and this week she fully experienced it. She is now truly free. As hard as it is on those remaining behind, we can rejoice because we know where she is and who she is with.

We can have freedom in the spirit because we know our sins are forgiven. Ultimate freedom will be ours when we are forever with the Lord.

This isn't the happiest post I've ever written but it's the most peaceful. Knowing where she is, that I'll see her again, and that she is free, truly free, her mind beautoful again, will keep me moving forward.

I Am Still His

for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and all are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus. Romans 3:23‭-‬24 NIV

As I think about this verse I can think of no words I can use that will enhance its beauty and perfection. There are pieces in God's word that are just so perfect that they need no additional explanation. They are understandable, believable and wonderful just as they are.

Today was a heck of a day. And I may not have prayed or thanked God as often as I should have. But He is still here with me at the end of my day, speaking to me, giving me strength to get these words to you. It's important to him that you know how much he loves you. Today may have been rotten but I am still saved. Today I may have wondered what God was doing in my life but I am still his child. I am still his. He is still here.

Perfection.

Solving Puzzles

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1 NIV

I love to play solitaire. I have an app on my phone that gives me a daily challenge puzzle. I play both the traditional solitaire as well as spider solitaire. I have learned, as most of you may already know, that almost all solitaire puzzle combinations can be solved. In fact, so far I have solved 100% of all the spider solitaire puzzles I have attempted. The daily challenge puzzle for the traditional solitaire game has been, so far, always solvable. However, there is one catch: sometimes you have to replay the puzzle and make one move differently in order to solve it. One. I'm working the puzzle, moving cards around, and get to a point where I'm stuck. So, knowing the puzzle is solvable, I try again. But do you think I'm gonna make the same moves twice knowing I'll get to the same outcome? Nope. I try different moves. Sometimes it's only one move that makes the difference, like moving the 8 of hearts off the deck onto a black 9 instead of the 8 of diamonds which is on an adjacent deck. It's the card underneath that then triggers the solving of the puzzle. One move can make a difference!

The same can be said for words and actions. One word or action can make a difference - good or bad. And the great news is we already know what move we shouldn't make - use harsh words - don't answer angrily to a routine question. I've done it. I'm tired. I don't want to talk, and my answer comes out with the wrong tone, implying I'm angry or upset.

A lot of times in playing solitaire I don't know what different moves would make a difference, but here God gives us the piece of the puzzle we need to solve it! Carefully use your words. Consider your actions before moving. It can make a big difference in how your puzzle is solved.

Keep Moving Forward

And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Colossians 3:17 NIV

I am constantly reminded to do what I do with thanks and grace, making sure I am humble and grateful, showing God's love in all I do. I'm also constantly reminded that us pitiful humans fail miserably at this. Every. Single. Day.

It's not that I'm not grateful. But my propensity for human kindness is limited in my current physical body. I personally think God has a sense of humor and gave us all these directions he knew we couldn't follow just to see what kind of trouble we can get ourselves into. And it's a lot. My heart and my mind say two different things, warring with each other over the tiniest stuff. Again, cue God's smirk as he watches me figure it out.

And really it's what it's all about. Us figuring this thing out day by day as we grow closer to eternity. It's like daily deposits into the ultimate retirement account. It drains you now but the payoff is huge. So I'll keep messing it up and fixing it and messing it up again. So will you. So will all of us.

Keep smiling and moving forward.

Have Courage Be Kind

Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always strive to do what is good for each other and for everyone else. 1 Thessalonians 5:15 NIV

Today was Friday the 13th. Usually I don't get worked up over superstitions, letting the day go by like any other. Well today lived up to its name. My email, among other things, got hacked. The person even managed to purchase a few things on my credit card. I spent the better part of a few hours changing passwords, calling companies, freezing my card, and checking bank accounts. It's nothing major but was a major inconvenience.

I could file police reports, have them go after the person who did this. But then again what good would that do? Justice is one thing, vengeance is another. It's tempting to want to take from someone when they've taken from you, but God's grace says to forgive, do good and move on. It's not the easy thing to do, but nothing worth doing is ever easy.

So I now have new passwords to remember and will be down a credit card till we get a new one. But my conscience is clear. I've done what I need to do and I forgive them and will move on. It's what we do.

In the words of Cinderella, have courage and be kind.

Oh, Be Thankful

Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Colossians 3:15 NIV

We sure can worry about a lot of things, can't we? We worry about our families, money, jobs, world affairs, what the president will tweet next, all sorts of things. We worry to the point of frustration, where little things can then set us off causing an instant, intense reaction. None of this gives us peace.

The peace of God is not even imaginable as there is no way to understand why, in the world we live in, that Christians can go about their business seemingly without a care. It's not that we don't. It's that we have faith in the one who is in control. That is a peace truly of another dimension.

Oh, and be thankful.